Things That Bother Me

First of all, I just wanted to say that I accidentally followed my own blog. So fuck you.

Anyway, I thought I would take an interesting twist on things and complain for once! Oh, wait...

So, anyway, here are some things that have been pissing me off lately:

1. Food

I fucking hate food. I hate it because I love it. What the fuck, dude? Who decided to make food taste good? I loathe all chefs and recipe makers. How dare you give me the desire to eat? Now I'm turning into a cow. Thanks, assholes.

Whoever the asshole is that
invented the deliciousness
that is Taco Bell, fuck you.

2. Easy classes

Yes, I would like the GPA boost. But I don't need it. I seriously don't need to take a class that has a required text which defines the words "goods," "services," and "ideas." I'm sorry, but if you're this stupid you shouldn't be in college. And I shouldn't be forced to waste my time on easy classes because stupid people need a major and classes tailored to them. If that offends you, then maybe you should stop being so stupid. Also, if you're one of those people who need to take easy classes to raise your GPA, then start studying in your real classes. Seriously, people shouldn't be allowed to raise their GPA this way. It's like cheating. I raise my GPA by being a fucking genius.

This textbook insults my intelligence.

3. Unnecessary apostrophes

This is not the first time I've vented about grammar in my blog. However, if I'm talking about things that piss me off, it is bound to surface. YOU DO NOT NEED TO PUT AN APOSTROPHE AFTER ABBREVIATIONS OR BEFORE ANY "S" ON A PLURAL WORD!!! APOSTROPHES ARE FOR CONTRACTIONS WITH IS AND TO SHOW POSSESSION!!! For example, saying, "I have a lot of DVD's," will make me respect you 25% less automatically.

Learn English.

4. Health freaks

I get it that you're so insecure about your lack of interesting and desirable personality traits that you have to advertise that you are the epitome of perfect health and you have the body of a god. Please save it, because I don't give a shit. I don't care how often you work out or what kind of dietary supplements you are taking.

5. Not being able to perform magic

In the words of genius DaxFlame (http://www.youtube.com/user/Daxflame), "Magic doesn't exist? Oh really? Then explain magic tricks you nimwit." So, clearly magic exists. WHY CAN I NOT PERFORM MAGIC TRICKS? Seriously, how else am I supposed to keep my things clean or stay awake during the day or keep myself in shape? There's no doubt that this needs to be investigated and we need to implement magic tricks ASAP. That, or I need someone to tell me where I can get a magical fairy that will clean up all my shit for me and do whatever I tell it to.

Be my slave, bitch.

...To be continued, I'm sure.

K